


moonshine isn't just a drink

by vhscassette



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: M/M, Sexual Humor, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-13 21:58:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14757060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vhscassette/pseuds/vhscassette
Summary: how yamcha got his scars.slight nsfw jokes, no actual smut content.





	moonshine isn't just a drink

"Yamcha! Get back here!" Yamcha heard Tien yell from behind him as he stomped-slash-stumbled out of the old desert-side bar, face aching with an angry stinging sensation. No, he wasn't going to 'get back there'. He was gonna go the fuck home, drown his sorrows with another few shots of shitty moonshine, and go the fuck to sleep. "Yamcha!" Tien called again, Yamcha hearing a strange sound that typically indicated that Tien was beginning to levitate towards him. Yamcha angrily sighed.

 

"What the fuck is it, Tien?! What the fuck do you want?!" Yamcha yelled, whipping his head back to face Tien. The stupid damned stinging sensation kept burning and it pissed Yamcha off. Damn those stupid bikers and their fuckin' glass bottles. Tien opened his mouth to say something but quietly froze, his train of thought appearing to have run off.

 

"Your.. your face is _really_ cut up," Tien quietly mumbled, his face becoming more gentle and concerned. Yamcha groaned in annoyance and angrily wiped at his cheeks. He felt the hot blood on his fingers, the slickness, the still ringing pain that reverberated through his cheeks.

 

No fucking shit, Shinhan.

 

Yamcha turned away once more, attempting to fly off before he felt Tien's strong hand grip his wrist, pulling him back down.

 

"Knock it off, Yamcha. We need to get this cleaned up," Tien said, studying how deep the gashes appeared to have sunken into Yamcha's face.

 

"I don't need your fucking help, Tien!" Yamcha had yelled, snapping, "If some group of assholes decided that I was the prime material to beat up, then I guess that's how my life goes! I don't fucking need this shit!" Yamcha's face had slowly begun to flame in embarrassment and shame, tears slowly starting to burn in his eyes. Silence echoed throughout the desert, the nighttime wind slowly breezing through the two of them. The light from the bar still faintly glimmered in the distance.

 

Tien gazed at him sadly and held his wrist.

* * *

 Yamcha had ordered one of the other men at the bar a drink upon noting a light blue hanky in his right back pocket. He wasn't a moron; he knew what he saw. He's been here long enough, been to many places, and seen a lot of guys to know how undercover shit can get.

 

The man had looked at him with a strange look as Yamcha sipped from his glass. Yamcha gave him a side glance, as if to say, "You get what I'm throwing at you?" The man then glared before snorting.

 

"What, you think I wanna fuck you or somethin', y'fuckin' gross ass rat?"

 

One thing lead to another, Hanky-Guy started slurring him seven ways to Sunday, and Yamcha threw a punch to get him to shut up. This punch, of course, knocked Hanky-Guy the fuck out and blasted him through old wooden walls. Some patrons glanced at Hanky-Guy, who was now lying unconscious in a back room, and then back to an ashamed and silent Yamcha who was now moving to leave. Some bikers found this situation funny before stepping up to challenge Yamcha themselves, waiting for an opportunity to fight.

 

Tien had heard bottles cracking as he quickly washed his hands and left the restroom he had been in, eyes flicking to every direction to see what was going on. In mere moments, however, he saw Yamcha knock out five leather-clad bikers before sprinting out of the bar, his face looking strange and.. red. Red as blood.

* * *

Yamcha sat against the shore of the oasis, sniffling and wishing he could just wither up and disappear. The guy had worn _light blue_ ! _Light blue_ on his _damned_ right side! Yamcha kicked himself repeatedly for the incident, whether the guy had intentionally lured him in or if Yamcha looked too far into things again. Tien noticed this and sighed, wringing out some wet cloths that he had ripped off of his green gi. Slowly stepping up to him and falling to his knees, Tien brought one of the cloths up to his cheeks.

 

"It's gonna sting," Tien warned before wiping at Yamcha's cheeks, the green cloth slowly staining with red. Yamcha hissed with pain and grit his teeth. Tien apologized awkwardly before continuing to clean his face, putting down one bloodied cloth to use another clean one. A voice in Yamcha's head mourned the destruction of his 'beautiful face' and couldn't help but hoarsely chuckle. "What's so funny?" Tien said distractedly.

 

"Is my face really cut up _that_ bad?" Yamcha questioned with a tired smile, a part of him still wishing this night had never happened.

 

"Well, you're not gonna die, but I can't guarantee this'll heal without a bit of a scar on your face," Tien replied, cleaning off the last bit of blood on Yamcha's face before firmly holding the wounds closed with his fingers.

 

Yamcha whistled lightly. "Ain't that some shit," Yamcha muttered, still vaguely amused, "havin' the balls to give a guy a drink in public and I get my ass kicked. What a fuckin' douchebag."

 

"Agreed," Tien nodded, keeping firm pressure on his wounds.

 

Yamcha had told Tien about his vague interest in men and experimentation years prior, in which Tien didn't really react much at all. If Tien had a problem with something, he'd wouldn't hesitate to say so; when Yamcha came out, Tien had merely looked at him and nodded in understanding. It wasn't long after that Tien had followed suit and came out as gay a few months afterwards, a quiet admittance to something that was eternally to be kept under lock and key to everyone asides themselves.

 

It also was a fact of life that Yamcha tended to get his ass kicked when he started dating outside of the friend group for the first time. It typically ended up that Yamcha either flirted with someone's girlfriend or he simply flirted with the wrong guy, so to speak. There were still some scars mangled across his arms that weren't from ki blasts or of his own self-inflictions. This was the first time, though, that he ended up getting some across the face.

 

It was enough to make Yamcha feel hatred burn across his skin for not the first time.

 

"Tien?" Yamcha asked, Tien still applying pressure to his now less-inflamed gashes.

 

"Mm?"

 

"Am I gross for likin' dudes?" Yamcha asked with a tinge of guilt, the familiar pit of sadness and confusion slowly settling in his stomach.

 

"No," Tien quietly responded, "it's not gross. _You're_ not gross. If girls can like guys, why can't we?"

 

Yamcha chuckled. Tien _always_ used that reasoning when they had discussions like this, but nevertheless Yamcha appreciated the sentiment. "I know the sayin', Shinhan. I guess I'm just tired of getting my ass kicked and I just.. feel like it's my fault," Yamcha admitted with a sigh. His cheeks still hurt from the glass shards.

 

"Been there, done that, it's not an enjoyable experience," Tien chuckled, keeping a hold on his wounds and gently glancing into Yamcha's eyes. Yamcha gazed back, wondering how the hell Tien had such long eyelashes.

 

'How do more guys not try to get Tien's number, anyway?' Yamcha thought to himself in astonished shock. It took him about two seconds to realize Tien didn't even have a phone. 'Well, that'll about do it. Good one, me,' Yamcha thought to himself, having to avoid raising his eyebrows in his own dumb amusement. Tien blinked and smirked.

 

"Didn't know my eyes were that interesting to you, Yamcha," Tien said with a smug grin.

 

"Oh, fuck you, Tien," Yamcha replied, glancing away in annoyed embarrassment.

 

"Buy me a drink first, hanky-boy," Tien responded with a chuckle, causing Yamcha to bat his arm.

 

"Don't make me scar your face to add to your chest collection, triclops," Yamcha said with a chuckle as Tien slowly let go of his no-longer-bleeding wounds. Yamcha still thought the cuts felt strange on his face, but there was nothing he could do about it now.

 

"I don't know," Tien said, standing up and stretching before landing Yamcha a hand, "I think I'd still look a bit more cool than you do regardless." Yamcha grinned and accepted the hand up.

 

"Nothing looks cool on you, so I don't think that's saying much," Yamcha replied coolly, trying to ignore the remaining ache in his face. Tien snorted.

 

"Uh-huh. Y'know what'd look good on you? Blue handkerchief," Tien responded, dusting off sand from Yamcha's clothes.

 

"I think you'd look better with a foot up your ass," Yamcha retorted.

 

"I know that you're bisexual, Yamcha, but I didn't think you were that kinky. Gross," Tien said, sounding serious yet entirely joking. Yamcha laughed loudly at that one.

 

"Oh, what the fuck do you know about kinks, Tien?" Yamcha laughed snarkily, getting a bit up in his face. "Your ass hasn't even gotten one date, let alone one dick," he continued, "you're lame." Tien raised his eyebrows with a sly smirk.

 

"I may not have gotten a date, but I got one huge dick right in front of me," Tien retorted smugly before his face crinkled and turned to the side. There was a slight pause as Yamcha slowly had a shit-eating grin spread across his face. "Yeah, not the best comeback I've made tonight," Tien shyly muttered, scratching the back of his head.

 

Yamcha, of course, entirely took that opportunity.

 

"I'm sorry, Tien," Yamcha questioned sarcastically as he began walking forward to go home, "what was that? A huge _what_ right in front of you?"

 

"Shut _up_ , Yamcha," a red faced Tien groaned.

 

"Oh, no, I just gotta get this for the record, after all!" Yamcha said with an over-dramatic seriousness, "I just gotta get it clear that you, Tien Shinhan, said that there was a huge dick right in front of you! And that person was me!" Tien rolled his eyes and groaned louder in embarrassment.

 

"You know I meant your personality, asshole," Tien grumbled, eyes entirely avoiding Yamcha.

 

"Oh, but that's not what I'm getting at! Because _you_ said-" Yamcha started before being interrupted.

 

"Your dick is little and it compensates for your big-headed personality. There," Tien said, trying to toss the insult-beanbag back to Yamcha. This, however, simply caused Yamcha to increase his dramatics with a laugh.

 

" ** _Oh! Okay!_ ** " Yamcha over-dramatically said amidst laughter, "I get it now! So it _definitely_ wasn't just my personality you were referring to, but my dick, too! I get it! Thanks, Tien!" Tien became immediately flustered and blushed deeply, shoving Yamcha's shoulder.

 

"That is _not_ what I meant!" Tien angrily yelled in embarrassed frustration, immediately defensive.

 

"But that's what I heard!" Yamcha loudly teased back, "You said my dick was small, therefore you had to have thought about it before! So, it's cool!"

 

Tien, face red as a tomato, angrily yelled in frustration before quickly blasting off into the night, leaving Yamcha giggling in the desert dust. The giggling stopped after a while, Yamcha standing in the darkness of the now-dark desert. Stars pierced through the night as Yamcha gazed upward, silently enjoying the breathtaking view. Crickets chirped endlessly and Yamcha felt incredibly small.

 

Suddenly, Tien reappeared, grabbing him by the waist and picking him up.

 

"We're going home!" Tien yelled, face still adorably red, before blasting off back to where they came from.

 

Eyes wide, Yamcha felt the wind flip his hair endlessly as his mind remained on the fact that Tien didn't leave him behind.

**Author's Note:**

> i like writin them bickerin tbh lol


End file.
